Requiem
by xXxCAINxXx
Summary: Still not good at summary's but I edited the first chap with a short addition.AU,OOC etc...Rated for future chapters. ME IDIOT DELETED THE FIRST TIME i POSTED ALONG WITH THE REWIEWS.SORRY ABOUT THAT :
1. Chapter 1

**Requiem**

_Disclaimer: my father is a damn good lawyer and he can buy your asses. Wanna sue me for havin fun? Try bitch! XD_

_Warnings: I write because I like to. Don't like, don't read. Not a happy story._

_Rating: NC17 all in all_

* * *

The only sound was the light buzzing …the bright white light illuminated the surroundings. A warm summer day in the park laying in the soft grass with him again. Body too tired to move, brain too tired to think. Or was it him? Probably. He had that effect, confusing thoughts, feelings. So light… body…like floating on a soft cloud in that blue sky. He liked to watch them, he looked so at peace when he did. Just staring into the endless sky…he was beautiful…a black angel. So tired…the light is fading… mind wants…peace…darkness…no voices…no…the voices in the park…too loud…so dark…

* * *

I shot up in bed as standard to the standard sound of my alarm clock. The one I've had since I started school 10 years ago. Staring wide eyed at my cobalt blue sheets for a few seconds my brain finally caught on. With a groan and a murderous intent I looked over at the chinese dragon with the digital clock in the middle and the source of the horrid tune sitting on my nightstand. Mom bought it for me so I won't be late from school. Turned out it worked better than expected as the next morning everyone woke up with a near heart attack thanks to it. I still have to smile when I recall their faces in my doorway. Letting my body fall to the side an arm reached out to silence the thing. The only reason I haven't broke it was the fact that it had been a present. With a sigh I threw the covers back getting out of bed. Mind still blank I zombied into the bathroom trying to avoid any none moving large objects in my path like the doorframe to the bathroom, which I specifically liked to bump into. Preferrably head first. I was always useless without a few things. These include: morning shower, at least 8 hours of solid sleep and thoughts about killing the math teacher.

Towel. Check. Toothbrush. Check. Toothpaste. Check. Looked into mirror on way to shower stall to affirm I look terrible in the morning. Check. Tripped and almost fell into said stall. Check. After completing the procedure I was finally able to turn on the water, brush my teeth, wash,-hair too- and feel kind of human again. I was never a morning person. Though you've probably guessed that by now. It was a miracle, once out of the shower my brain began to process what my eyes saw. Drying off I headed for my room –more specifically the huge wardrobe in it- with steady steps. Which is an accomplishment at 7 am. At least for me.

Ok. Clothes. Now that's not a part I like to spend much time on. Got a relatively ok taste and fashion sense thank God so I didn't have to think for hours what matches what and still look like I've dressed in a pitch black room. Got most of my shit from Hot Topic yes but no, I'm not emo. Don't like labels kiddies. Never did. Took out a pair of fitting dark blue pants -before you even think it no, fitting doesn't mean so tight I had to literally squeeze into it-, an also fitting red and black striped hoodie, white n' black checked belt n' my fav black converse along with red n' black striped gloves. Got a problem with it? My parents did.

When I trotted down for breakfast I didn't exactly expect the news I was about to hear. When I got into the dining room mom looked troubled, father looked like always. Nothing ever changed on that stone face of his so it didn't surprise me. The man wouldn't budge even if his mother died. Yes, you're getting the right impression. I'm not particularly good with my father. He doesn't like me I don't like him. Plain and simple. Actually I bet he couldn't care a shit less about what I do but just wants to annoy me and make my life miserable.

"Good morning." I said nonchalantly as I sit down at the table. Standard procedure. Like everything around father.

"If you had a sister I swear you're stealing her clothes." see what I mean? There it is. The old man's starting it again. Not that it's wise to argue with him so I just play with my fork.

"Dear, it's fashion." mom always tried to stand on my side without getting on father's bad.

"For girls." he snarled "And I'm fairly sure we have a son."

I saw the waitress bring in the tray with our breakfasts. As she's setting it on the table I'm quite sure the rest of breakfast will be spent in silence. That's normally the case after the above scenario has occurred. Not that it's every morning but becoming more and more standard lately. I threw sideway glances at mom. She sat across from me a little to my right. I didn't like to see her nervous but didn't want to ask either. Not that they'd tell me anyway, unless they want to in which case they will do so without me having to ask.

"Would you like some tea master?" turning my head towards the soft voice I came face to face with Hinata on my left. She was a nice girl. Too shy but nice.

"Yes, thank you." I watched her pour the steaming liquid in my mug. It didn't particularly fascinate me but it's not like I had anything better to stare at. Some would disagree. Our house was more like a mansion, radiating wealth.

"Sasuke," I wouldn't have bothered looking up at father if I didn't know what an endless rambling I'd have to hear out about manners if I didn't…so I did. "I want you to be home by 5 pm."

I raised a brow at that. 5 pm? Was he kidding me? "Father I'm 15 and not…" I started to protest but he cut me off mid sentence.

"I said you be home at 5. Your brother is coming for a short visit while he's on a business trip and you're not going to be rude and miss it." he than promptly went back to his bacon and eggs not paying further attention to me.

Oh, so Itachi was coming. I haven't seen my half brother in a year or so. We were never close anyway, I would've even chanced he looked down on me too back then. As for me, I didn't really have feelings toward his person…maybe envy towards the idol everyone made him out to be but not him…frankly I didn't even know him. For father he was perfect. Itachi did everything right, got good grades, had the looks, manners, the works. On the other hand if he's visiting and I have to be home early so as not to miss him than exactly how long was he staying? A few hours? Maybe until the next day or so. Breakfast went uneventful as normal from that point.

* * *

"Uchiha!!!!" I cringed at the loud screech from behind my back and the running steps. I didn't have to turn to know it was Uzumaki Naruto. The biggest pest in school and my best friend. Though not even heavy torture could ever gotten me to admit that.

"Morning to you too moron." I smiled as a hand hit my shoulder. Hard.

"I got her number." I heard the grin in his voice before I saw it on his face as I turned and shut my locker in the process leaning on it arms crossed.

"Who's number dobe?" my mind really couldn't come up with the info at the time and I was just too foul to dig for it.

The blond's face dropped taking on an incredulous look. "Sakura you freak! Sakura!" he yelled getting into my face.

"Oh" was my only reply with a smirk while pushing away my stupid classmate.

Naruto Uzumaki – like most guys in our school- had the hots for a pink haired girl named Sakura from class C. Admittedly she was very pretty and smart to an extent too. Good but rare combo. Being the princess in school she was a bit…hard to access though. Well the fact that her father could buy off most of the schools family's with no problem didn't help either. The guys were afraid of her and the girls envious. Talked to her a few times though and she was normal. Just plain normal.

"Oh?" he made a stupified face, stopped invading my personal space.

"Well, told ya to ask her." I shrugged starting for our first period.

The next thing I knew Naruto was on my back, shouting in my ear to wait up and nearly strangling me in a glomp. He could be so childish. We had Phys, maths, bio, PE –my personal 'favorite', lit and marketing –twice-. Had to listen to Uzumaki all day babbling about his love of course. Not that I mind. Really. If he becomes too much I can tune out. You got to learn that around the guy. He had a date with pinky after classes. Was freaking out on where to take her. Jeeez. It's a first date, take her to Pizza Hut or something.

The sound of the chalk hitting the blackboard echoed in the room. The bright yellow lights of the Sun covered the trees outside still but angry gray clouds were already approaching from the distance. Judging by the flashes illuminating the darkness from time to time it was going to be a bad storm. Autumn is always like that though and I loved it. The melancholy weather calmed me down, it matched my mood most of the time. Except when I was with the blond idiot. He could always make me smile and feel a little happy. I didn't have time to think much around him, just listen to him rant all day long about nothing important or specific at all…but it was good that way. Maybe our differences made us such good friends in the first place. The bright sunshine and the angry storm.

"Mr. Uchiha." I cringed at the tone my name was uttered in, slowly turning back to the classroom.

"Yes, ma'am." I stared at her half there half out of school already in my mind.

"Now that I have your attention would you please tell me what I was trying to explain to you in the past hour?" her tone clearly stated she thought very well I had no idea. Which was entirely true.

"I wasn't paying attention ma'am." so why bother.

"In that case you'll just have to stay after class." I paled. She turned back to the board and started to assign homework.

Impossible. If I stay after classes father would kill me. "Ma'am!" I said a little louder than I wanted to.

"Yes Mr. Uchiha?" she asked in an even tone not even bothering to turn around or interrupt her writing.

"I can't stay today my brother is coming to visit and father…" I knew I was ranting but didn't care at that point until she cut me off finally turning with a scowl.

"I'm very sorry you'll miss quality time with your brother Mr. Uchiha but you should have payed attention in my class and if you happen to get in trouble because of staying in…" she dragged her eyes over me dissaproving." …well frankly…I. don't. care." she punctuated the last words to make it extra clear that she meant it.

Naruto shot me a worried glance from my right. He knew father well enough to know I'm in for it if I'm late when I'm not supposed to be. Especially when Itachi's coming. Shrugging my shoulders I started doodling in my textbook until the bell would ring. Didn't want to get into a conversation with the boy and get him in trouble too. Mrs. Crow wasn't a happy sport nor was she pleasant in any way. Ever. Truthfully the way I saw it she was a sour old hag who hasn't had a good fuck in ages, thus she spends her frustration on her surroundings. Even more so on me. Given I usually gave her an excuse to d it too.


	2. Chapter 2

**Requiem**

_Disclaimer: my father is a damn good lawyer and he can buy your asses. Wanna sue me for havin fun? Try bitch! XD_

_Warnings: I write because I like to. Don't like, don't read. Not a happy story._

_Rating: NC17 all in all_

* * *

The Rolex on my wrist showed 7 pm as I walked out the classroom door. Why bother running now? I was screwed either way for being two and a half hours late not to mention getting detention again. Checked the handy too. Yup. 5 not accepted calls. I could hear the roar of thunder for a few minutes already and the sun hasn't been shining through the window for about an hour by than. As I stepped out of the building I could see my driver standing under an umbrella at the base of the steps. His old, chiseled features were stern as always but it didn't make look cruel like father and Itachi. Maybe that's why the old man loved my brother and not me. They were alike in almost every aspect, except that as far as I can recall my brother, he enjoys being cruel. Father just is. I stopped at the top of the steps as the driver jogged up to me with the umbrella nodding his head slightly in greeting.

"Good evening Sasuke-san."

"Evening Tanaka-san" I nodded back as we both started down the stairs under the huge black umbrella.

"Your father is impatiently avaiting you." he continued in his usuall monotone opening the back door for me.

"I know." My voice sounded strained even to my own ears as I climbed in and leaned back against the warm leather trying to force my heart out of my throat.

"Is my brother there yet?" I asked growing nervous, crossing my arms over my chest as Tanaka-san entered the drivers seat.

"Yes Sasuke-san. He has arrived exactly as scheduled at 5:30 pm."

Of course, Itachi had no faults. How could I even think he could be late. Dropping my head back on the back of the seat I tuned out gazing through the blurry window. The now silent rain ran down the cool surface like teardrops from the sky, it's sound like a soft lullaby. A calming sound helping me to tune out reality. I didn't want to meet Itachi, didn't want to face father, didn't want to be there at all. The streets were full of people and I just wished I could be part of that crowd. Not Sasuke Uchiha, not the son of a billionaire, nothing special. Just a happy normal 15 year old with a normal life without the expectations of a father made of stone. The rain and speed blurred the surroundings making it look surreal, like in a dream. A whirlwind of rainbow swirling in front of my eyes all the way home. My heartbeat started to slow down, for a moment I wished it would stop completely. Would it be peaceful? Would I still be there at all? Would I BE still?

The car coming to a complete halt and engines being turned off snapped me out of my half dazed daydream. My eyes focused on the Uchiha compound. A huge mansion in the middle of a garden even the royalty of the past centuries would envy. It was called my home but I never felt it to be. Just a place where I lived with my so called family. The only member I really loved was the fragile woman I called mom. She was the only person in the whole bunch that ever really cared for me as a person and not just a heir. The door opened again and I followed Tanaka-san up to the front door in the safety of the umbrella again. It wouldn't do to get an Uchiha wet now would it.

"Goodbye Sasuke-san"

"Bye." I watched the old man leave for the limousine with grace. I actually liked him. Though we didn't talk a lot he had a kind aura around him.

Turning to the door I braced myself before opening it. I wasn't quite sure if father would make a scene in front of Itachi but knew for sure that sooner or later he would and that would probably hurt like Hell. He was an aggressive asshole and when angered. He and brother had similarities but I never saw Itachi hitting anyone or even raging, well not that we met that much but he seemed so calm and composed all the time I couldn't imagine him doing that.

Rounding a few corners on the way to the salon where I suspected everyone to be my nervousness came rushing back with every step I took. Not only was I to face father but Itachi too. Whenever we met before he never missed a chance to humiliate me or hurt me if he could. And he mostly could. He just had the talent for these things it seemed.

Peeking around the last corner I had to force myself to swallow the sudden lump in my throat. There they were. Father, mother, aunt Kiyoko and her husband, some other people I didn't recognize and a firm, lank looking man in a perfectly fitted suit and long black hair. Itachi. Even though I couldn't see his face I was sure it was him. Great. Looked like they were having a gathering of some sort which I wasn't informed of up to that point, which meant that if I appear in my every day clothes father will be angry. On the other hand if he finds out I got detention and when I got back didn't attend immediately he will be raging. So the remaining question was, if you got two loads of shit which one do you step into? Opting for the –hopefully- smaller one I forced my legs to move.

"Good evening." I said announcing my presence as I walked towards them with the well practiced social smile dancing on my lips.

I caught fathers deadly glare the moment he noticed my attire, which was about the moment he noticed my presence. I had the distinctive urge to shrink and hide under the glare but managed to keep my composure, though I promptly had to turn my head to the others in the room to do so. Aunt Kiyko headed towards me with a brilliant smile, probably intending to pinch my face. Again. It's one of her hobbies you see, I just hoped Itachi didn't get away from the treatment either.

"Sasuke Dear!" she squeeled and…promptly pinched my cheeks throwing her arms around me. "How are you?" a real smile crept to my face as I hugged her back. She was such a nice woman not really part of that snob crowd

"Fine Auntie." The smile faded though as I caught sight of my half brother standing a few feet behind her looking at me. "And you?"

"I'm fine too dear." she chirped letting go and dragging me by the hand to introduce the people I wasn't familiar with yet.

The pink haired young girl not far from Itachi was Sakura Haruno, the blond next to her Ino Yamanaka, the grey haired silly elderly man Kakashi Hatake and I was surprised to see Naruto's step dad Iruka Umino. "Now if you'd excuse the boy darlings, he hasn't seen his brother in a while." And before I could say a word of protest I found myself in front of Itachi.

"Itachi-kun sorry for kidnapping your little brother for so long." she waved with a cheeky smile returning to chat with the others.

"Well, well." The smooth voice of my brother returned my gaze to him. "Long time no see."

"Quite." I said not knowing what else to say and frankly I never liked his company.

"A drink?" suddenly a glass was showed in front of me with what looked like whiskey in it. Staring at it dumbstruck I could only assume he was testing me and if I took it I'd be in trouble for drinking.

"I'm 15." I shot him a glare.

"I'll take that as a no." he said putting the glass down and taking a sip of his own as he leaned on the cabinet staring at the chattering people.

Not sure what to do I stood beside him, fidgeting with my sleeves. My eyes kept wondering back to his face though. He's changed since the last time I saw him. He was only 14 than and a lot more boyish than now. Even though he seemed slim and light like always you could tell that there was a defined body under the tailored suit. On the other hand even when Itachi was my age he was more firm than me. Not that I was fat or slobby but I was smaller and thinner than him, I hate that word but kind of…girly compared to him.

Moving my gaze to his face I was greeted with a pair of black eyes staring back at me blankly.

"What?" the voice made me snap my head to the crowd at the front immediately.

"Nothing." I said looking at my toes. "You changed." I always felt nervous around the oh so perfect Itachi Uchiha.

"It's been 5 years." He stated matter of factly. Of course he was right. Who wouldn't change in 5 years.

"Yeah…"

We didn't talk much after that. He asked about my school and that's about it because father needed to talk to him and Kakashi about something. I couldn't hear and wasn't interested to begin with. I got stuck with Aunt Kiyoko and the two girls who apparently thought Itachi was the hottest guy on Earth and I was a cute mini Itachi. I couldn't see that much of a resemblance but obviously everyone else did. The Sakura girl was seriously a pain in the ass. She kept ranting about her new haircut and the dress she wore last new year. Ino didn't talk as much thank God. I oh so hated these gatherings and had to refrain from checking my watch every minute or so. By the time the guests bid their good bye's and left I was practically brain dead and seriously considered to announce the pink menace public enemy no.1. Knowing my presence wouldn't be needed anymore I said my good nights and headed for my room. To tell the whole and complete truth I wasn't tired at all but not about to spend more time than needed in the presence of those two.

That's where I thought wrong. Father immediately came after me grabbing my right arm, not enough to bruise though. "I need to have a word with you Sasuke."

"Sure." I almost choked on my words as he led me into another room where no one could see us and spun me around to face him towering over me.

"Who do you think you are?" he started voice dripping with scorn. "You think you can do whatever you want? What are you? Didn't I tell you to be home at 5pm?"

"You did." I said not looking up at him.

"I did. Yes and when did you arrive?" he leaned closer to me and spoke as if he would be explaining something to a very small child.

"At 7:30" my voice grew weaker.

"Exactly. Which means you're either too stupid to know the clock or you were in detention again." He stopped there and I had a distinct feeling he already knows which one and is waiting for me to tell him.

"Detention father but…"

"There are no buts Sasuke…you always get into trouble in school. You're always late, you disgrace me and your mother in front of everyone. Thank God Itachi isn't like you. This is all Mikoto's fault, she's not even fit to be called human. She's a moronic weakling just like you." He spat and I clenched my fists in anger. He can say what he wants about me but not mom. "But that's it you little maggot. One more mistake like that and you're out of my house!" he shouted the last part right into my face before my head snapped to the side with a loud slap. "Now get the fuck out of my view and be glad your brother is here or you'd pay for this dearly!" he hissed and showed me towards the exit.

* * *

Once in the safety of my own confines I slammed the door shut and barely refrained from crying. Not only the slap but his humiliating words and the fact that he was right. I was nothing, he was the mighty Fugaku Uchiha and I couldn't do a damn thing about it. He beat mom up afterwards I knew it. Sometimes I saw blue or black spots on her here and there. She always has an excuse but I know it's him. When ever he's in a rage he takes it out on her. My chest heaved as I envisioned him laying dead in front of me in his own cold blood. I slammed a fist into the nearest wall with a frustrated cry promising to pay him back one day for mom, for me, for everything. Stalking over to the closet I swung the door open and snatched my Smiths and Wesson combat knife from under my shirts. Just seeing the smooth black metal satisfied me to an extent. I slowly traced the cool blade along the pulse on my wrist almost as if in a trance, my anger instantly fading, forced back tears disappearing. The edge of the knife moved away from the artery beginning to leave a red line growing deeper in it's way as the hand holding it applied more and more pressure. I felt satisfaction when blood gushed out of that line, warm liquid sliding down my arm and onto the floor. I watched the pool of red around my wrist as I sat in the corner opposite the door, patting the knife in the other hand. The more lines and the more blood I saw the calmer I became. It was my way to let go of the pain. My way of crying. The only way I could allow myself.

Panic rushed through me when something touched my cheek, my hand instinctively lashing out with the knife and before I could even realize who it was another hand caught mine smacking it against the wall beside my head. The sharp pain cleared my head a little and my eyes focused on the face of my brother inches from mine. Now clear and undisturbed fear ran through me. He saw. He knows. He's going to tell everyone. I stared into his emotionless black eyes with my own similar pair, just that mine were huge and terrified pleading for him to disappear. I wished he was just a dream, a mirage and would fade but he didn't.

"You're so weak…" he whispered more to himself as his eyes shifted away from mine to the bloody wrist.

Trying to calm my ragged breathing I searched for a retort…or any kind of response but couldn't find any. He was right, I was so weak. Moistness gathered in the corner of my eyes again and my head turned to the side on it's own accord as a sob escaped my lips. I expected Itachi to mock me, to tell me I'm weak again but not the soft hand sliding across my cheek in a soft caress. That was even worse than a slap. "Go away…" I whispered not looking at him, but the hand continued it's light journey on my jaw line, my throat to the collar of my hoodie. It was so humiliating. I didn't want him to be nice to me, especially not him. "I don't need your pity." I hissed steadying my voice as much as I could.

"I know. You pity yourself enough." the whisper came from right next to my ear along with the ghost of a breath on my skin.

"Get away from me!" I snapped grabbing his perfectly tailored shirt with my perfectly bloody hands and found myself raging at a stone statue. He looked so emotionless, cold and empty almost frightening. "Before I ruin your perfect suit completely." I added in a low voice letting go.

Leaning back on the wall I stared at the ceiling. Anything than him. I hated that, when we were small he smiled, I mean really smiled. He looked alive but now he's just a shell. Frightening and hollow. He was the epitome of what I never wanted to be. I could tell he still hasn't moved from his spot and his gaze bore holes in me. My head turned towards him again on it's own with half lidded eyes. "What?" I asked like he did a few hours before. I thought I saw just the faintest hint of…something in those endless pools of black…"Take me with you."


	3. Chapter 3

"Take me with you."

I heard a broken voice say those words before my mind even registered it belonged to me. The blood around my hand was turning a darker color as I turned my attention to that instead, it began to dry already. What a pity, I liked the deep scarlet and warmth of the fresh liquid. I just sat there staring at it, refusing to accept I uttered a word, refusing to accept that Itachi was still there seeing me like that. The pitiful human wreck in a heap on the floor of his own room in a pool of blood. Refusing to feel ashamed in front of him, refusing to accept my stupid mouth's plea for a helping hand. I was always like that…stubborn. Long pale fingers came into my vision as they lightly touched the dry redness covering the flash. I didn't understand him. Not than, not ever. Why wasn't he scolding me, leaving me, telling our parents, doing something instead of just kneeling in front of me like a statue.

"Why?" I snapped my head up at the question in surprise.

Shaking my head slowly an insane smile crept over my features accompanied by the same type of sound erupting from my lungs. A high pitched half laugh half sob as I looked at the hollow shell that was Itachi. His face was so beautiful, perfect from every angle, everything at the right place in the right shape but he wasn't there. A person wasn't there, not in the normal sense of the world. I've always wondered if niisan was even capable to feel anything at all. The blood rushed faster in my veins and thundered in my ears as the cool fingertips traced over the marred skin up to where my sweat's sleeves were jammed up. The chill in his eyes captivated me, my lips parted slightly as it sneaked cautiously over to my body, freezing me. There was no feeling in my limbs anymore, just the ice rushing through me and the numb pain in my chest. A single teardrop ran down my cheek, the first one in long years and I wasn't even sure if it was for me because I was so lonely…or for him because he was so empty…

"I leave tomorrow afternoon." He said barely audible before getting up and starting to leave in one fluid, graceful move.

The magic was broken and I watched his retreating back in sudden terror. He was leaving me, he would be gone maybe for years again, and he was leaving me than at that moment. My legs acted on their own as I found myself jumping up and running after him catching his sleeve before he could open the door. He stood there, hand on the knob, unmoving with his back to me. I wished he would turn around, would smile at me.

"I…niisan…" his posture tensed and I was afraid he would lash out at me any moment or hit me…but he didn't. Instead he turned his head just enough to look over his shoulder with the closest thing to an emotion I've ever seen on him.

His gaze wondered to the arm I had latched onto him, the same arm that was covered in dried blood. Relaxing again he faced me taking it into a hand more gently than I'd expected and started for my bathroom. Surprised and happy he wasn't going anywhere yet I followed him without a word. Let him open the tap and rinse out the cuts without a sound even though it hurt no matter how careful he tried to be. He was the only person knowing about this, not even Naruto. I loved and trusted him as a friend but this was my pride…and I had none left in front of Itachi now. He gave me a questioning look when he determined nothing else can be done with water.

"In my room…under the pillow." I mumbled feeling like a 5 year old.

He sat me on the bed taking a spot next to me and wrapped my lower arm with the gauze he found there without a word. I felt relieved and thankful for that. The last thing I needed was someone telling me off again. Surveying his work he carefully turned the bandage from one side to the other before letting go. My heart skipped a beat at that and I immediately grabbed his shirt in a silent plea for him to stay. He cared, at least he seemed to care in his own way and that was all I needed at the moment. Comfort. Even if he showed no emotion towards me he was there. For me. He was the only person ever there for me, to comfort me.

"Stay…" I said just above a whisper looking at the sheets at anything but him.

"I don't live here." he stated simply taking a hold of my hand in a vain attempt to pry it off.

My hold tightened as I looked up at him. "No…I mean now…stay with me…I know you don't care but…" I averted my eyes again, his hand loosened on mine. "…I'm so alone…" the last part came out barely audible, choking on a sob as the reality of my own words hit me.

I had to laugh, a weak pathetic laugh while tears rolled down my cheeks. The hand sliding across my neck to the back of my head made me turn towards him with a surprised look, one that grew wide eyed when I was met with soft lips half way. They brushed along mine before disappearing again leaving only a tingling sensation behind. Unmoving I opened my eyes to look at Itachi but he was already half way to the door my hand having probably let go without me noticing somewhere along the line. I let out the breath I was holding when the door shut from the outside and my half brother was out of sight.

Forgetting all my other problems for the time being I shot up and rushed to my desk snatching the handy and speed dialing Naruto. It took about 10 beeps but he finally answered in an overly sleepy tone.

"M'lo."

"Itachi kissed me!" I half screamed into the tiny machine's microphone.

"Mmm…what? Who is it?" I could just imagine the blond talking half asleep by that voice so I snapped at him.

"It's SASUKE you MORON! And my BROTHER just kissed me!"

Two minutes of silence came before I heard a very awake Naruto respond. "Did you just say Itachi Uchiha kissed you?"

"YESSS!!!!" I said relieved he finally got it.

"As in your brother?" I could hear caution in his tone.

"Yess moron how many Itachi Uchiha's do you know?" I ranted exasperated.

"Where?"

"On my FUCKIN LIPS!" I yelled the last part wanting to bitch slap the guy so bad at the moment.

"Oh…"

"Oh?" I raised both brows at that. Oh? What the fuck was that supposed to mean. Oh. "That all you can say?"

"Calm down Sa…"

"No! I won't calm down because my brother just kissed me." I said arms flying around the room in an attempt to get my point across.

"Did he play tonsil hockey with you or what?" he laughed. He actually dared to laugh.

"No fucknut but…but.." how was I supposed to tell him what happened when even I didn't get it.

"See, than maybe it's just his weird way of showing affection." he snickered.

"We're brothers. You don't kiss your brother on the lips. No way no how and…"

"Well he was always an odd ball." he interrupted sounding too cheerful for my taste. "What happened?"

So I told him the whole story from when I left school, 'cept for the cutting part. Best friend or not loosing face in front of one person per day is enough for me thank you very much. The damn bastard had the nerve to sound amused. That's one of my problems with Naruto. He means well but lives in a normal though wealthy family. His step dad loves him more than anything and he just doesn't grasp the reality of living in a Hell hole. When I told him about father he chuckled and said it's just a scolding I shouldn't over react though he did find the slap too harsh. He's not doing it on purpose but I just don't feel…understood by him when it comes to these things.

"Hold your horses Sas'ke and get to bed man." He said in a tired voice after almost 2 hours. "S' 3 am."

"Fine dobe…I just…wanted to talk to someone." I sighed "Night, see ya Monday."

"Nighty night." he chirped sounding a bit dazed.

The tiny phone flicked shut with a click and I fell back on the bed not bothering to turn off the light on the desk or shower and change. I'd do it in the morning because frankly I did feel weary. The room was suddenly cold as the silence and memories washed over me. I hated to be alone, loathed it with all that I am because I had time to think than. Closing my eyes in an attempt to fall asleep only brought up images of Itachi's. I couldn't sleep, too many things were running through my head but as I drifted into a half awake half asleep state the stone set lines of that perfectly chiseled face morphed into a young boys features. A 9 or 10 year old Itachi's, a smiling one. Familiar feelings I've even forgotten since than came back, it had been so long ago and I was so small back than…but I loved his smile, I can clearly remember that and he loved me back. Or at least that's what I thought at the time but now I even questioned if my brother is even capable of feeling love, anything at all. Was he that good of an actor? Or are both real? The caring and the cold Itachi…the only thing I knew was that he seemed to understand me…in a way…not judge me or tell me I'm over reacting anything. He lived here, he knows, he has to know.

* * *

I found myself stalking down the hallway towards Itachi's old room hoping he would be there after I realized I don't even know where he's staying. And believe me you don't want to look for someone in the Uchiha compound in the middle of the night. It was huge and I mean HUGE in nearly an industrial way not to mention creepy as Hell it being an old building. Shadows chased in every corner, the pictures of the deceased family members seemed to follow you with their eyes in the blue silver light of the full moon shining through the huge windows. Pulling the blanket tighter around my body I quickened my pace scanning my surroundings suspiciously from the corner of my eyes. The place still gave me the creeps especially at night. My room used to be the one next to niisan's when he still lived there, so I could go over to his when I was afraid. Which happened often, he didn't seem to mind though and even let me sleep in his bed sometimes. At others he would go over to mine with me and stay until I fell asleep.

I had to change rooms due to a renovation after I skilfully flooded my old room and a good part of the corridor falling asleep while running the water for a bath. It had been a year ago when I was 14 and preparing for my final exams. Father wasn't over joyed to say the least and I still have scars from his belt on my back and legs. I got another room on the far end of the hallway away from the workings. At that point I had no reason to object anymore but now I wished I had moved back to my old chamber so I could just walk into the other.

Finally reaching my destination I debated on knocking but it seemed useless. Even if he is in there and not in another room he's probably asleep and won't hear me anyway.

So I opted for trying the handle. It gave away, the hinges turning with a light squeak as one side of the huge double winged door opened. My heart skipped and I had to give a small smile in triumph. Father was seriously paranoid and kept everything shut if not used so niisan had to be there. Slipping through the gap I closed the door once again as silently as I could, than proceeded towards the bed but stopped in the middle of the room when I realized I had no clue what I was going to do. I wasn't even sure why I was there in the first place, it just seemed like a good idea to look for Itachi at 4 am at the time I got out of bed.

My chest became heavy and my heart fell audibly, at least to my own ears as it dawned on me that he would probably be mad if I woke him up in the middle of the night. Why would he want to see me especially at that hour. I was a no one for him, I had been for years. The whole situation was stupid. I wanted something I could never have again, I wanted niisan back but he wasn't my niisan anymore. He was Itachi, brother, the soulless statue my niisan turned into years ago. Why would he care if I feel lonely, why would he care if I'm sad? That in mind I took a shaky breath turning to leave.

"Sasuke…" his voice broke the silence stopping me in mid step.

"You were awake." I stated in the same soft tone he used.

My only answer was the low ruffling of sheets making me look back. He was now facing me, the moonlight illuminating his face in a silver glow through the french windows and made his coal eyes sparkle like gems. He just lay there on his side, unmoving, not asking anything. "I…" biting my lip I stared at the ground even though it was impossible for him to see me, shuffling my weight from one foot to the other nervously. I was afraid he would tell me to leave any minute now.

"Why are you here?" it sounded like thunder in the still of the night making me jump even though he said it silently.

"You're not telling me to leave?" I whispered still looking at my toes.

"Do you want me to?"

"NO!" I half yelled frantically eyes darting up to him.

I couldn't believe I was really hearing the amused chuckle coming from Itachi, silencing me more effectively than a gag. I've never heard him laugh since we were children, I had no idea it would be such a smooth velvety sound. "Come here." He patted a spot beside him, mirth still evident in his voice.


	4. Chapter 4

"Come here." He patted a spot beside him, mirth still evident in his voice.

My eyes darted to his face trying to pry at his features. What I wouldn't have given to be able to see his expression than. It was impossible though, the pale moonlight wasn't enough for that. It was as if I watched myself from outside of my body as my legs started to move along the soft persian rug towards the king size bed. As soon as I got to the edge of the sheets and my mind hesitated a pale hand reached out sliding along my lower arm before it grasped my wrist tugging me down. My knees bent obediently and I was pushed onto my back a moment later making my breath hitch. His hair was tugged behind an ear so I could see the morbid little smile on his full lips as he propped himself on an elbow right beside me. Biting my lip I turned towards him burrying my face in his chest and sneaking an arm around his bare waist. Heat rushing to my cheeks I scooted closer tightening my grip, begging in my mind not to be pushed away. If I knew he would stay longer I would never have allowed myself to do that but he would be gone the next day. We probably would never meet again, by the time he comes back I'd be out of that house forever. I was sure of that, I had to be, I couldn't take it anymore…

My muscles tensed involuntarily as cold fingertips ran along my arm making my skin crawl. I wasn't used to being touched like that anymore, so soft and tender. At that moment I just wished he would lie to me, say he cares, that he loves me. Anything but push me away. The fingers tangled in my hair massaging the back of my scalp as the bed shifted under me and I felt the heat radiating off his skin warming me, hot breath on my ear. Just like it used to be, when we were little, Itachi would always comfort me. His presence relaxed me, blanked my mind banning all trouble from it for a while. For the time he was with me.

"You're really that lonely…" my chest crushed up at that voice. He sounded sad…or did he? For a moment there I thought so but…why would he? He never cared did he now…

Tracing circles on his back with a finger I opened my eyes to slits. "Let me stay…" I said against his chest.

My only response was a small kiss on a cheek, almost too soft to notice. If I had been a bit more tired and dazed I would have thought I imagined it. But I knew for sure I didn't and no matter what reasons he had…it didn't matter at the moment. My breathing calmed as I settled against him fighting sleep off. I didn't want to spend the only time I was allowed in the past again asleep. I wanted it to last, didn't want to loose the illusion. Didn't want the familiar ache in my chest back that only niisan could chase away. He didn't say a word more…I didn't either…I was afraid the mirage would break…that he would disappear and all would turn out to be a cruel dream…

* * *

I woke up with a start as soon as my mind was able to process that the spot beside me was empty. Shooting up in bed I looked around frantically noticing I'm not in Itachi's room anymore but in mine. Panic rushed through me when the digital numbers in the usually noisy little dragons stomach showed 2pm. He said he leaves that afternoon. Jumping out of bed I rushed out of my room and down the hall just to find the door to his room locked. Breathing heavily I tried to suppress the salty tears suddenly threatening to roll down my cheeks. He was gone. For good. It was over. My sleep dazed mind couldn't understand it. He didn't even say goodbye…after the night before…I thought…

Letting my back hit the door I slid to the ground hugging my knees, with a frustrated scream. I was back alone in that Hell hole again. Everything back to normal. It wasn't fair… somewhere in the back of my mind I hoped he would take me with him…somehow…or…I didn't even know what I hoped for…but it was all over…he was gone. My mind rambled, running in circles, only around the fact that the door was locked, he was gone. Nothing else. I sat there crying for a good half hour before I decided to head back to my own confines…kicking every single door on the way of course. Pent up tension is bad for your health.

I spent the whole weekend in my room not up to seeing anyone, not even mom. Not that they would care or worry, I showed up at the family meals but that was about it with socializing. I felt betrayed somehow, even if I knew I had no right to be upset. I meant nothing to Itachi why would he care to…ehh never mind. Not that him saying bye would've made things any better anyway. The more I thought about it the more bitter it became. I had a caring brother just for a few hours and now it was all I longed for but it wasn't real. Not even than. He always knew how to hurt people, me without doing anything mean at all.

Monday morning I found myself almost slamming the alarm into the nearest wall. Deciding to put it back in it's place and just opt for turning it off I scrambled out of bed ready to get through the morning routine. I hated to wake up lately, it felt so cold even if the room was hot as Hell and the monotone of living there got on my nerves suddenly full blast. Picking some plain black clothes without giving them a second glance I got dressed in a hurry and headed for school hoping to get my mind off of what's troubling me at least for some time there. From past experience I knew that even if Naruto wasn't the most understanding of people on Earth he could be a very good comical relief so to say? You think that's a mean thing to say? Naw. You see, like I said before, I like him. Can't change my impressions though.

The minute I got to my locker the blond idiot jumped me as predicted, rambling in my ears. Knowing from past experience's that it's not a good idea to show to the moron that I have a problem I turned around whacking him upside the head with a frown. That was about as close to normal as I could manage, especially since I wasn't even in the mood for people. At all. Not like Naruto noticed much on his own, the guy could be ignorant as Hell which was fine with me as long as he wouldn't bother me with his stupid immature questions. Well he did anyway but at least not about my private life. On the other hand, thanks to him and some others I was able to get my mind off my brothers visit and the whole shit at home for some time which was a nice relief I got to admit…but as the days passed and I went through the same shit going to school than home, living just like before those times became rarer and rarer. I must have started to act strange because even the blond became suspicious. Not to mention mom. I was never a people or family person for that matter but thinking back I was becoming isolated. Making excuses from meals at the house and extra school activities I locked myself in my room shutting the curtains mostly doing nothing. Old memories I thought I forgot came back. Memories where I was happy, they all had niisan in them, playing with me, smiling. I loved his smile when I was small…I loved him…but he was different back than.

I felt betrayed laying in the dark room on the maroon sheets smelling like jasmine that the maid changed just that day. Itachi's always had a hint of something similar to jasmine scent for as long as I could recall. Even a week ago when he was there. It usually calmed me before for some reason but at the time it just made me long to see him again. To get some answers from him, I wanted to know why he betrayed me…again. Why he left me again. Why he acted like he cared again and than throw me away, even if in the back of my mind I knew he would…it wasn't fair. I wanted to hit him, wanted to see him bleed for showing me what could be and than taking it all away.

Three days grace's 'On my own' pulled me out of my thoughts. Opening my eyes lazily I pulled the small cell phone from a pocket and flicked it open expecting it to be Naruto. I wasn't in the slightest mood to talk to him but knew that if I didn't pick up and he was worried…which he was now for sure, he'd just barge over…and that was the last thing I needed in a homicidal mood.

'Unknown number'

Now that wasn't like the idiot. He always called with ID shown, basically because he was a retard when it came down to electronics and had no idea how to set his multi functional magic phone to hide the ID. And no, I'm not kidding. Spent about two hours trying to explain the functions to him when he got it and ended up literally ripping at my hair…and tempted to rip at his too but refrained.

Curiosity getting the best of me I flicked it open with a sigh. "Hello?"

"Hi Sasuke." a somewhat amused voice rang from the other end that made my heart skip several beats.

"Itachi?" I croaked not quite capable to control my voice chords yet.

"Who else?" I could've sworn he was snickering but let it slide for the moment.

"What do you want?" now that I was talking to him totally unexpected I didn't know what to say. My mind was blank.

"What kind of way is that to greet your dear brother?" he mocked.

"I…YOU left without a word." the accusation left my lips without a second thought.

The only answer I got first was a low chuckle. "I didn't have the heart to wake you."

It crossed my mind if he even had one but kept that to myself instead saying. "You could've left a note I thought…"

"Thought what?" he asked after a while.

I didn't know what to say. 'I thought you left me all alone again.' Sounded so pathetic. "Nothing."

"I talked to father." My head snapped up at that.

"About?"

"About you." anger washed over me along with a slight hint of panic making itself known as a chill down the spine.

"How could you…" I accused in a strained tone, a familiar wetness welling in my eyes again…

"He said it's alright."

"What?" I squeeked incredulous and completely not comprehending now.

"You can spend summer vacation with me." Shock. Yeah…that was my first reaction. Summer? With him? Gaping like a fish I opened and closed my mouth several times no sound emitting while my brain tried to put together…

"You ASSHOLE!!!" I heard myself scream into the microphone of the handy before I could stop myself. "I though you told him about THAT!! You gave me a fuckin' heart attack!!!"

"I know." he said exasperated. "Seriously Sasuke if I wanted to tell him I could've done it while I was there and you would know about it by now."

He was right. Of course. On the other hand "When did you talk to father about this?"

* * *

Sorry short. -- In the middle of exams n stuff 


End file.
